That was the title of the email in my inbox this morning. And I had to answer in the fuck affirmative, ie FUCK YEAH! Because who isn’t curious about She-Males? Like what do they call ‘em in French? “Elle mâle”? My run-ins with She Males have been sadly, few. A statesque she-male prostitute stopped me […]

What happens when Buffy goes against Bonds. I wrote this a few years ago.  

1.The extremely tall, extremely butch woman delivering documents. She’d be a good looking man, but she’s a very tall lady. She pulls up in a little white van and she wears slacks and a men’s dress shirt with the collar popped. She wheels out a little document cart stacked with boxes and rolls into the […]

This is the closest thing I could find to Greg’s wife’s ethniticity My wife, the Latina. She’s half Italian, a quarter Maltese, a quarter Mexican and 100% Pachuca. She tells people she’s Latina. Which I guess ¼ of her is. She even has a t-shirt that reads “Latina”. Not "¼ Latina", or "My Dad is […]

The following was discovered by the crackerjack blackmailers and thieves at Industry Nexus Day 1-5: (reported by inmates) Hysterical sobbing, accompanying by alternating cries of “Mom!,” “Why me?” and “I’m too hot to be in prison.” Day 6-8: (reported by inmates) Sniveling, looking for mirrors. Found mirror, screamed at state of hair extensions/roots/pores, rushed back […]

1. Catal Hyük 2. lintel3. the black oak4. Grace Jones5. Corrugated Tin Roofing6. agape7. PEZ8. Chili sauce

yes, I watched the Republican Debates. While I have seldom voted for a Republican (the only I can think of was Richard Riordan, Former Mayor of Los Angeles) I like to know what they have to say. Eternally optimistic, I was really hoping I would hear something inspiring.  Always looking to break from my HMO […]

At Crackpot Press we don’t do gossipy shtick but this afternoon had an impact on me. On my somewhat daily voyage to the gym, a few cameramen were hanging out front. This happens from time to time because of the art house movie theater next door. High brow actors often premiere their passion projects there. […]

Watching television requires a suspension of disbelief. We know that things have to happen in a certain way, in a particular time frame, and that it isn't always possible to pay attention to the little day-to-day stuff like the rest of us have to. But sometimes there are things that only occur on television that […]

In our on-going SMOKING GUN MEMO series, Crackpot Press has uncovered something incredulous at the Toho Fob and Re-Tooling Company. For those who don’t know, Toho has contracts with Boeing, Halliburton and, yes, the United States Armed Forces.